Time Off

What do you take time off of work to do? Vacation, care for a sick relative, attend a conference, dentist appointment? All of the above I imagine. I doubt your answer included anything about terminating a pregnancy, which is why I was taken a bit by surprise when recently a Chinese friend of mine gave this as her answer for taking 2 weeks off of work. Before I expand, note that I am not interested in pro-life/pro-choice debates...it's not about that. I have my opinions and others have there's...I respect that even when I don't agree. It's more about the fact that in my culture this stirs controversy and in Chinese culture it is just a part of life. There is a one-child policy. If you do not have the financial stability to pay the tax/fee for having a second child, there really is no other option. I researched and found that an abortion costs about $88 here, which is not cheap by Chinese standards, but it’s affordable and the operation is standard procedure…about 13 million are done in China alone each year. And although statistics ranged depending on the sources I checked, about 35%-50% of women in China who have one abortion have at least one more in their lifetime.

With that in mind, it made me wonder about birth control here. I have heard from a foreign friend that one of the primary forms of birth control besides condoms is IUD in China, but I don't know what percentage of women even use this. From what I can gather, China seems to be on the fringe of a “sexual revolution” where it is becoming more acceptable to have casual sex, have sex at a younger age, and express sexuality in the way you dress and act. But I’m not sure about the education of it all..are the coming generations informed about STD’s, sexual health, and the like? Why are there so many abortions? I wonder if it is cheaper to get an abortion than to pay for a year of birth control? Does health insurance (for those that even have it) cover and make birth control a priority? I know my Chinese health plan does not include or cover the cost of any birth control. Is there a stigma against those who use birth control? I wouldn't think so in a country where family planning is such a big deal. So many questions the more I consider this topic.

But back to my friend. It was no secret really. My Chinese girlfriends openly told me, although she did not want to discuss it with Erich. But that is more about the social standards of Chinese culture than the issue of abortion. Women here tend to mainly hang out with women and men with men. Even my younger Chinese friends will invite only girlfriends to movie, dinner or to hang out...the men hang out separately somewhere else. (It’s not an issue of one sex being more superior to another…communism emphasizes that the women contribute and work as hard as the men and are awarded the same benefits. Just because you are a man or woman doesn’t mean you can’t contribute to the betterment of society as a whole. Men and women share that responsibility. That’s a whole different blog though. I digress.) So the fact that the news was shared openly with me but whispered in front of Erich was more of a reflection of social interactions in general in China rather than a reflection of any embarassment or shame in having the procedure done.

So I wonder…would my friend (who already has one child, so would be breaking the law to have a second) have the baby if this wasn’t a legal issue? Does that thought even pass through her mind? In the States, the concern is for women’s rights and choice. Pro-choice advocates defend a woman’s right to choose if abortion is right for her and to decide what happens within her own body. Pro-lifers are concerned about the rights and choices of the unborn baby. And here in China where the act of abortion is a non-issue, the issue seems to be more centered on “can the government force abortions?” A complete 180. It’s not about, “Are abortions right or wrong?”, it’s about “Should abortions be the choice of the individual or the society?” Right now, it’s the latter…and an entirely different issue of women’s rights. In the States women struggle to have the right to terminate a pregnancy by their own choice, in China, women struggle to have the right to birth multiple babies by their own choice. It’s an interesting shift in perspective for Erich and I as we consider our friend’s time-off.