Tampons and Sharpies

What do these seemingly unrelated items have in common other than their obvious similarity in shape?  They are the two prized possessions I bring back to China with me and beg others to use as filler/packaging peanuts if they are so kind to mail something to the Middle Kingdom anyway.

A dear friend of ours unfortunately left China in the spring to relocate back to Iowa.  I nearly wept when she offered her gigantic plastic tub of tampons to me just hours before we said goodbye.  You think I’m joking.  Honestly.  As I unpacked the colorful array of wrapped cotton tubes beneath my sink, I was overcome with what I can only describe as the deepest gratitude and love for my friend.  I sure will miss her, but she couldn’t have expressed her friendship in a more meaningful way.

Needless to say after the monster gift of tampons, I didn’t need to bring back many from the States this summer.  Which allowed me to pack even more Sharpies than expected.  Fine Point.  Ultra Fine Point.  Chisel Tip.  Look it up, they exist and I love each of them equally.  Black, lots of black…but also the color packs.  I got them all and they will be used and appreciated each time I replenish the supply in my classroom and around the house.  Check any drawer in our apartment and you’ll find one.  They are so handy and helpful.  Having my fingertips brush across a pointed, juicy (full of ink) Sharpie in the dark depths of an abandoned corner in the art room is always sure to brighten up my day.  The one clipped on my smock is vital to everyday art teacher survival and almost as important as the one in the kitchen drawer next to the forks.

So I know what you’re thinking.  Of all the things in all of the world that I could miss from the States while in China the past 2 years, this is all I’ve got?  My answer…yes.  You mean tampons and permanent markers don’t exist in China?  Kind of.  Yes, there is ONE brand of tampon here, but it can be hard to find and not of the quality or type that is likely comfortable for any woman.  (Sorry gentlemen for the topic, but it matters.)  As for permanent markers, yes China has them and I have bought all types, colors, and brands.  They typically end up not actually being permanent and washing away into a muddy smear when painted over or washed…or when uncapped in the moment of shear joy to use for the first time, they disappoint by being nearly out of ink or completely dry…jipped again by the friendly old lady at the art store!  Sharpies are reliable, bold, and above all else, PERMANENT.

To review our summer holiday, we spent awesome time with family and friends, ate some good Mexican/Thai/American/Spanish food, and drank plenty of microbrew beer.  I packed pretty much nothing but gifts to give away when we came to the U.S. and returned to China crossing my fingers that the stern Chinese customs guy wouldn’t confiscate my bag full of tampons and Sharpies…the only thing that stood between me and another harmonious year in China.

Chinese Changes

There are certain mannerisms and habits we have acquired during our 2 years in China that we often don’t notice until an outsider picks up on it and points it out to us.  For example, I was sitting outside of the café yesterday, chatting with Chen (part owner of the café) and Ralf (friend, foreigner, and fellow resident of Beilun for the past several years).  As I was talking to Chen in my broken Chinese and her broken English, Ralf interrupted me, “Maybeeee…” and chuckled to himself.  I gave him a strange, questioning look…what’s that about?  He was amused that I had picked up saying “maybeee” as a kind of space filler when speaking to the Chinese, as many of them do this when speaking English.  I laughed aloud…did I really do this?  Nooooo, I don’t do that.  So I continued talked to Chen and sure enough, the next sentence out of my mouth had a “maybeee…”.  I caught myself and we had a good laugh.  Maybe it seems like nothing too out of the ordinary, but there are plenty more.  While we haven’t worked our way into the public urination habits, Erich and I find ourselves doing plenty of other “Chinese” things that we rarely did two years ago.

One: Being pushy.  In a crowd here, you have to be aggressive.  Push through, make room where you want it, and have no concern for personal space.  If you don’t, you get left behind and end up more frustrated than you ought to be.  Yes, we still have manners and encourage queuing at the cash register or scales to weigh fruits/veggies, but it hasn’t quite caught on in China, so when in Rome…we’ve learned to hold our own, let’s just say that.

Two: Noises.  To tag onto the original story here, there are a lot of noises that the Chinese make to mean things like “yes”, “no”, “I’m listening/I understand”, etc that are just noises, not actual words.  I find myself and Erich using these in mid conversation with others.  I guess you could equate it with the “oh”, “okay”, “uh-huh” and “hmmm” in the States.  I also have adapted some of these noises that are used when confused, excited or surprised from my Korean and Chinese middle and high school students who are quite animated and can communicate an alarming amount of information by noise rather than words.

Three: Eating Habits and Manners.  There really are none here.  The only no-no I’ve experienced is not to place your chopsticks vertical in your food (it is a symbol of death).  Other than that, spit your food (peels, bones and other inedible parts) on the table, place your mouth to the bowl and shovel in or slurp, and eat from anyone’s plate…eating is extremely communal here.  We really enjoy the sharing of food and have come to like the practicality of the Chinese style of eating.  Erich has also come to use the Chinese style of toasting when out with friends.  Say some kind words and a thank you, clink glasses with everyone at the table (making sure the rim of your glass is lower than the person who you are toasting with…a sign of respect), then move on to another table and toast them…or if with a small group, continue toasting at regular intervals.  The local beer here is usually about 2% alcohol or less, which lends to high quantities of toasts and drinking until you actually feel any effect.

Four: Gift Giving.  It’s a very simple but important part of this culture.  People are very giving, but you have to do the same.  Someone comes to the café and brings a huge bag full of local fruits to share.  You pretend not to accept, say “no we couldn’t possibly take them”, compliment the gesture and after some time of this banter, you accept and eat and share with anyone around.  But then you must bring that person a gift of the same equivalent in the future.  Making sure it is not more extravagant or less significant.  Gifts are given for attending events, holidays and just because.  We’re still working on being better at this since we hate buying “stuff”, but fortunately fruit and food in general is a very acceptable and common gift in China, so we’re not bad at that.

Still having another year here, we’re sure there are more habits to come, some more noticeable than others…some that we will see and some that others will point out to us…some that will become more apparent when we leave the country and they don’t seem so “normal” anymore.

Do Not Pass Go, Do Not Collect $200

A day to mark in history: the day we unknowingly stumbled onto a Chinese naval base while on a bike ride and were detained, questioned, and locked down for 6 hours.  It’s like something you’d see on “Locked Up Abroad” but this time we really didn’t do anything wrong.

It all started when Erich, Matt and Kari (fellow teachers) and I decided we wanted to take a bike ride to the coast and try to get onto an island we saw on Google Earth.  It was a beautiful, sunny day…the first we’ve had in weeks without rain and I have the sunburn to prove it.  As usual, we quickly got off of the main roads to wander off the beaten path, through local villages…getting lost, turning around often, and problem-solving our way around highways and waterways.  We stopped for lunch at a mom and pop shop around 2pm to fuel up for the last stretch of the ride.  We could see the bridge to our island in the distance and confirmed with the restaurant owners the directions to our destination.  As we approached the water, we couldn’t figure a way to the island that didn’t involved a heavily trafficked highway/bridge that meant sudden death.  So we ventured toward a hilltop to try and find a good view and another possible way across the water.  After huffing and puffing our way to the top of the steep hill, we had to make a decision at the top: do we go back down and circle around the mountain to see what’s there or do we park our bikes and take a dirt path to see the view of the water and island from there.  This is where our day turned around.  Had we decided to go with option #1, we would have ridden halfway down the hill and seen the huge military base entrance that was there.  Instead, we locked the bikes up and began wandering through patch after patch of farmland before coming to an opening with a great view of the water, shipping ports and island we were scheming to visit.  We stood and talked and enjoyed the view for about 10 minutes, during which time we saw a farmer and waved to some guys looking at us from their window (remember these guys…they are why we encountered our next friends at the bottom of the hill).

Anyway, then we descended the hill back to our bikes only to be met by a black car and about 5 gentlemen in uniform telling us to please come with them.  HUH?  We looked to the left to see about 5 more men in uniform running towards us with shovels raised and ready to attack.  Really?  What was going on?  So we really had no choice but to be escorted by these men down the other side of the hill and into the military base.  The first man to talk to us had limited English and was polite but curious about who we were.  At this point, we knew what had happened and why we were there…we had been hiking on private Chinese military property.  It was like we were the people who had hiked over the Iraq/Iran border and were accused of bring spies/journalists in a classified area.  Not really that serious, but it’s the closest thing I can think of for now.

They walked us into a room and allowed us to sit together for about 5 minutes, finding out if we had cameras (I did but luckily hadn’t taken any photos all day), and then separated us into different rooms.  This is the fun part.  We sat isolated in these rooms until 9:30pm.  That’s about 6 hours of sitting alone with a variety of military guards standing at attention in front of you…just staring.  Occasionally, someone with a little English would come in and ask some questions.  Medial things like where are you from or small talk about being a teacher, having kids, and your hobbies.  We were told just to wait a little, wait a little and when we thought something might happen and there was talk or commotion among the guards, we were told to wait some more.  To avoid falling asleep and to make time go a little quicker, I practiced my Mandarin with the guards who would listen and reply, looked for Chinese characters I knew in a newspaper laying around, and stared out the window to the going’s on in the lot outside of the building.  At one point, I asked to go to the bathroom to stretch my legs.  On my way being escorted to the toilet, another military man handed me a drawing and told me that my husband had drawn it (in Chinese).  It was a sketch of one of the guards standing at attention.  It was actually really good and he asked if he could keep it…”sure, yes, of course, it’s your’s” I assured him with a smile.  At least I knew Erich was being entertained by drawing his captors.

At about 6:30, I was told I could eat dinner.  Really feeling like a prisoner now bring told when I could and could not get up, sit down, drink and eat, I told them no, I wasn’t hungry but thanks anyway.  He insisted and after a few minutes, he added “your friends will also eat with you”.  I quickly agreed.  It seemed like I had been bored to death for too long and after being alone in a room for 3 hours waiting for something to happen, this sounded like a better option after all.  So he led me into their kitchen where 4 separate tables had been set with feasts of Chinese food and seats had been placed strategically so that when we sat, no one would look at the others.  I sat at the table that seemed to have the most vegetables and waited to see a friendly face.  As Kari and Erich filed in, we laughed at the rediculouslness that we had gotten ourselves into.  Kari and I started to joke about the situation and were quickly told by one of the soldiers to be quiet and eat.  OK, roger that.  We just wanted to leave…so your wish is my command if it wil expediate the process, whatever that may be.  At this point, we still had no clue what was taking so long and when we asked, they only said “Wait a moment, Sorry”.  When Matt came in to join us, he hadn’t heard the warning to not talk, so he began chattering away.  Making jokes, asking questions and enjoying other English speakers.  He must’ve thought we were being rude to him because all we could do is muffle laughter and try to stay quiet while momentarily glancing at the guard to guess when Matt would get the same warning we did.  It never happened, but I think it was because no one responded to Matt.

At 7:00, one guard came in and said the translators were here and they needed to interview us individually.  I volunteered first…let’s get this over with.  They walked me into a room, closed the door and began asking questions about who I was, what I did for a job, who my husband was and what he did, the names and contact information for my boss, my boss’s boss and pretty much any other Chinese friends of mine, all of the places I’d been in China, why we were here, did we know where we were, did we know that this area was restricted military zone, did we regret our decision…the list went on and I answered easily and honestly.  After all, it was a genuine misunderstanding and we had nothing to hide.  I did suggest that they should have a sign or a fence where we entered the hill from the road.  The path looked like a hiking path and there was only farmland in view.  How were we to know?  They didn’t seem too receptive to the idea.

Later, I found out that they had also asked Kari similar questions, but had been more stern and serious with Matt and Erich, asking questions like, Who is your leader on the tri today?  Are you in the FBI/CIA?  What is your role in the military?  Why don’t you have a job (Erich)?  How do you live without income (Erich)?  Apparently women can not be spies so there is no need to take them seriously or consider their ability to be an FBI agent.  I was a little offended yet still relieved that I didn’t get these questions.

An hour later, I was taken to another room where Kari was and she was taken to be interviewed.  The new guard in this room was either much more friendly or as bored as we were and willing to bend the rules to make the evening more comfortable.  He initiated conversation with me, wanting to talk about America, sports, my job, and at one point (with paranoid and frequent glances down the hall to make sure the coast was clear), he asked me to teach him some yoga poses and we had a little class together.  Haha.  Much more calming and relaxed.  He let me get out my phone and I texted some friends about the insanity of my day.  He also gave me pen and paper (which I used to do some school work and write student narratives for report cards as I waited more).  But he always straightened up when another came into the room.

I got texts from Erich and Matt who were in the other rooms, apparently with other guards who decided to loosen up on us.  It was becoming more and more amusing as hour after hour passed, but also more and more alarming as we all began to come to terms that we’d likely be staying the night at this military base.  But at 9:30, our knight and shining armor arrived.  Lisa, our Chinese financial manager at the school pulled up in a school bus and they quickly shuffled us out of the building and onto the bus with our bikes.  We apologized one more time and thanked Lisa profusely for coming to help.  They had contacted her, among other Chinese staff at our school to find out more information about us.

And so ended our epic bike ride to the coast to visit the islands.  Best story I’ve had in a long time and we’re fine other than some lost hours of daylight sitting in isolation, jumping to conclusions about our fate in China.  I have a feeling it’s not over yet.  Our School Board director has already called me into her office for an early morning meeting and I can guarantee we’ve been red flagged in the Chinese system.  Our emails, phone calls and every move are under surveillance (more so than before even), and who knows what else.

So does this story make up for not blogging in over 2 months?

Mother Nature, Wo Ai Ni

If I could get paid for it, think I could blog solely about hiking, biking and trekking across China (and the rest of the world if you let me). There is something about breathing fresh air, sun shining on your skin and the serene silence of nature that gives me a high like I can’t describe. Today was one of those days. Our friend, Chen, asked me to go on a hike with her to see the spring trees (peaches and pears) in blossom. I couldn’t turn down the offer. As we headed towards a mountain park near our home that we often bike to, Jiu Feng Shan, I saw a sight like nothing I’ve seen at a mountain park before. Cars parked for 100’s of meters along the entrance and literally swarms of locals filing into the park. I guess we weren’t the only ones who thought we’d get out on this beautiful, sunny and clear day to see the blossoms!

Don’t get me wrong, I love the Chinese, but I wasn’t so excited about being elbow to elbow with a couple hundred of them as we hiked the paths “taking in the nature”. So I was thrilled when Chen suggested we head deeper into the mountains to another hiking path she knew. As we rode a bit further into the mountains, she showed me the small village where she was born, which was unfortunately being torn down (the whole thing) to make room for new development. Chen was born and raised in Beilun and has a lot of pride in local culture and sharing it with Erich and I often.

As we pulled onto a random street and parked the car, we walked through a little village and came to the entrance of another park with hardly anyone else there. So we hiked, or rather climbed, stair after stone stair, coming to an opening where people barbeque and pick tea. There was hill after hill of “cha shu” (tea trees), which aren’t quite ready for picking, but Chen assured that they would be soon. She grew up near these fields and would go to fields similar to this as a child to pick tea after school and during her free time in the spring and summer. As she told me more, she led me scrambling up the hill that had no path, only small tree after tree (more like bushes really) planted on a steep hill. At one point, we got stuck finding our way back down and had to slide a little ways between tea trees to another landing. Eventually we made it back to the trail and came to a fork. The few others we saw there went to the left, so we naturally opted to go left and see what no one else was.

Up we went, and then some more, and when we thought we had reached a peak, we went up more from there. It was a good steep climb made even better by the fact that we saw almost NO ONE the entire way up! Maybe this doesn’t seem like a big deal, but let me refer you back to paragraph #1 and the swarms of people entering the other park. Let me also remind you that we live in China. There is no such thing as being alone with 1.3 billion other people living in this country. So this made the journey upward even more enjoyable. Just me, Chen and the great outdoors. There weren’t any peach or pear blossoms on this hike at this park, but honestly, it didn’t matter. The peacefulness of it all was better than any flower on any tree.

After about 2 hours of working the ol’ legs and several false alarms of getting to the top, wo men dao le (we arrived)! I had to help Chen overcome her fear of heights to stand on the rocky peak and enjoy the view, but we could see for miles and miles. We walked along the peak for a bit, passing a few other people finally, and then found a path back down. Along the way, we came to a point where we could see the peak of the other mountain park (the one with all of the people). I should have taken a photo, but it looked like sprinkles on top of an ice cream cone. TONS of little dots of all colors scattered about the peak, poking out of the trees. Boy, was I glad to not be one of them.

We scrambled back down, discussing everything from the cost of tuition in universities across the world to how to walk down a steep incline so you don’t slip and fall to Chen’s proposed curriculum to make me learn Chinese characters faster. Before we knew it, we were back at the car, heading out of the park. Just another hike really, but on such a perfect day with just the right person.

West Capital

Erich and I traveled to Nanjing this weekend. The trip was initiated by a conference that I attended and we thought, why not Erich join and relax/explore somewhere new too? So we took the 5 hour train ride to China’s old, Western capital city andhere are a few things to share that we found fun and interesting (almost none of which you would find in a guidebook). Really, it’s the little things that entertain us.

1) On the train ride there, upon exploring the reading materials in the backs of the seats, we stumbled upon this image. Of course I get what they were trying to convey. However, the placement of that watering can is not well thought out. On top of that, it doesn’t help that on the average day walking around the streets of Beilun you will see your fair share of people relieving themselves in the middle of a busy public street in this exact position. It kept us amused for a good 10 minutes of the train ride…then we had to find other ways to entertain ourselves for the other 4 hours and 50 minutes.

2) We love the subway. Any city we go to in China that has one, we ride it often and wish there were more around here. It makes getting around so easy and much faster/cheaper than taxis. Plus, you always make interesting conversations with locals who want to practice their English. We were offered a small gift (something that looked like a wooden ornament) this time, but kindly turned it down. Anyway, Nanjing had a subway system that was very small and less crowded compared to those of Beijing or Shanghai, but we took this video of a typical ride on the line. Trust me, this is not at all crowded compared to what we’ve experienced in the bigger cities. We’ll have to record video in Shanghai next time we go. Have you seen the YouTube videos of subway security literally packing crowds in like sardines? Kind of like that. Erich likes to play, “who showered this morning?” by sniffing out culprits.

3) After the conference, we did findtime one day to visit ZhongShan park. It was HUGE and very beautiful/peaceful by Chinese standards. It was the first time I saw tents and picnics set up like we’re used to in the States. This park is also the site of Sun Yat-Sen’s mausoleum as well as the burial site for several other famous Chinese leaders. Sun Yat-Sen is the “Father of the Nation” and was China’s first official President in 1912. I guess you could think of him as China’s George Washington? Anyway, there was a building on a large hill that you could climb up with several hundred other Chinese tourists to pay your respects. So up we went, step by step to the top. Along the way up, at the top and down, we must’ve been stopped by at least 10 groups who wanted photos with us. This is fairly common practice and we typically joke around with them that it’s 5 yuan per photo. After several peace signs, arms around each other and “qie zi”’s (sounds like “cheese” when you say it, but translates to mean “eggplant”), my cheeks hurt. Who knew we’d be the local celebrities of Sun Yat-Sen’s final place of rest? Also at the top, we saw these gnarly trees that were pretty cool looking. After a closer look, we concluded that the top of the tree was actually the root system of one tree turned upside down and grafted to the trunk of another tree. So essentially you had the two bottoms of two different trees grown together to create these new odd and fun looking trees.

In all, it was a fun and restful weekend away. Oh, and the conference was okay too J

Time of Your Life

Have you ever used this phrase? You’re at a point in your life where things can’t seem to be better, life is treating you well, and you are happy as a clam just to be living your life each day. Erich and I said this a lot in Colorado. It was the first time we had lived in the same state, let alone the same house. We both had jobs that we loved and worked with colleagues we called friends. The Rockies were outside our window and we took advantage of the great outdoors as much as we could…hiking, biking, snowshoeing, skiing, camping. We were surrounded by micro breweries, local foods, and live music…life was good.

Then we moved toChina. And before we did, I distinctly remember having a conversation with Erich that included thoughts like, “You know, it’s going to be hard for life to get better than this. We are at the peak of our lives here in Colorado. Why are we leaving again?” And we were right. In that moment in time, we felt like we had it all. So why were we leaving? I think we’re both “gut” people…when something feels like it needs to happen, don’t question or analyze. Do. We live with our instinct and our hearts, which isn’t always a good thing, but it has worked for us thus far in life. So we left Colorado because there was something inside both of us saying that there was more out there for us somewhere.

When the dotted line was signedto come to China, we both still thought…really, China? It was the last place we thought we’d end up, but we decided to go with it. Some of the best things in our lives have happened because we least expected or planned for them. Couldn't hurt to test that theory half way around the world.

And here we are now, amazed that we can have conversations about our life here and say…no THIS is the time of our lives. Colorado was outstanding, but this is a different kind of outstanding. Erich owns his own café and community center. I work with the most wonderful students on the planet. Our friends, we consider family. We can travel all over Southeast Asia and China. We have the opportunity to live in a place SO different from our home country and consistently question our own values and thoughts on life. We are staying a third year for many reasons, but I think one of them is because there’s nothing else that seems likeit could possibly be better for us right now.

So is it the place or the person that determines your state of satisfaction and overall contentment with life? Have Colorado and China been “the best times of our lives” because of the places we were, or is it because of our outlook and approach to life? Either way, we count ourselves lucky to be able to feel this way. I guess the true test will come when we decide to leave China and see if this pattern of good luck in life experiences follows us to the next place…

Ni duo da le?

"How Old Are You?" My friend, June, asked. Having just celebrated my birthday, I was fairly sure I was 28 years old. I was corrected today. I am actually 30. Who knew? We were sitting in the café, discussing our Chinese zodiac signs and ages, and upon saying I was a 28 year old mouse, June began doing some mental math and was quick to let me know nicely that indeed, I was wrong. Yes, I am a mouse according to Chinese astrology. This is based on the year I was born. Easy math since there are only 12 animals on the Chinese zodiac which cycle and all the Chinese know the order so can quickly figure out what “you are” by working backwards from the current year in multiples of 12.

Anyway, back to why I am 30 according to the Chinese. June began explaining that when you are born, the Chinese believe that you turn one. Okay, I thought, this isn’t too uncommon. Most of the Korean students at my school go by the same rule, so when asked their age, they have a “Korean” age and an “other” age. But where did that extra year come from? The Chinese also believe that on Spring Festival (Chinese New Year), you celebrate another birthday (along with 1.3 billion other Chinese citizens who also celebrate their birthday during Spring Festival). SO, since I turned 1 year old upon being born, when Spring Festival came in January of 1985, I became 2 years old with the rest of the country. Then when my real birthday came soon after on February 7 in ’85…can you guess? Yup that was actually my 3^rd birthday. Silly me. Haha. After that, the birthdays stayed the same, but it all added an extra 2 years to my age. Confused yet? Yeah, it took June a few times to walk me through the math and calendar to understand the logic behind it all. It makes sense when you look from the perspective and traditions of Chinese culture.

Just when you think you know everything…